Today I have been given the best gift that I could ever have wished for. EVER. I am an Aunty to a gorgeous, perfect, round-faced baby boy - Fred Williams. Weighing in at 4.15kgs...yes, you are reading right...your eyes do not deceive you...he is a monster.
Last night before I left the office I updated my Facebook status with these words...
Dear Universe. I know you like to provide me with moments of infinite gratitude and that you support me through the tough times...but seriously, you are testing my patience with the birth of my nie/phew...BUSTING to meet him/her...can you please, pretty please, deliver him or her this weekend? Thanks x
That was at 6.45pm South Africa time...at 10pm South Africa time my sister's contractions started...little did I know...
I woke up this morning with my home phone ringing...it was 7am. Dark and cold. And I just KNEW. I sleep with my mobile phone on silent. And only my family knows my home number. So the only time it rings, it is one of them. And sure as eggs. It was Tobes. 'Gigga - Junior is coming today...' We laughed and joked a bit and my sister handed the phone back to Tobes when her contraction hit.
And for the remainder of the day I have been in constant comms with the family. Mom flew down to Joburg 5 days earlier than planned (in Tobes words, the little soldier needed her mom), I laughed and joked with my sister...she sent me rude Whatsapp pictures to focus her mind elsewhere and the day passed us by...and then suddenly they were at the hospital...6pm...and I got a text at 7.08pm Uk time from my mom...'its a boy'. At that exact time, I was in an Italian restaurant in St John's Wood with Matt and some friends. I levitated off my chair and shouted...at the top of my lungs...along with the compulsory 'running-on-the-spot' excited motion...'its a boy!!!!' The rest of the restaurant starred bewildered!
And from that minute I was overcome. It was like a wave of pride, care and 'Aunty-love' washed over me. I bolted out the door of the Italian, without scarf or coat (it is 2 degrees here at the moment) and immediately called the family. My mom was teary, she handed me over to my sister who was crying, Junior was crying his eyeballs out in the background and tears were rolling down my cheeks. I will never ever forget that moment. The memories of how it all happened will fade. But that feeling of a family united with love...never. And just like I remember the sound of Junior's heartbeat so distinctly when we had a scan in June 2012...loud, steady, strong, happy...so too will I remember the sound of his cry in the background of that phonecall.
Since then it has been a whirlwind...texts, phonecalls, Facebook, photos, more phone calls. The evening has passed in a blur. But today. Today is a special day in my family. We have our first BOY. A happy, healthy, gorgeous, chubby boy. There is safety in numbers for you Tobes. 3 girls and 2 boys in our family now...the power is shifting!!!!
I have spent a lot of time thinking about why I have been so certain that Junior was a boy. After all, there was absolutely no factual basis for my idea whatsoever. And I think (if it is possible) that I might have 'willed' that 'sperm/egg' combo into being a boy. They say the power of positive thinking can move mountains...in my case, I reckon it ensured biology! Initially I just believed it was a boy. And then I was told that if it was a boy, they were going to call him Fred, after my dad whom we all miss every day of our lives. And I think then my faith and hope kicked in. I wanted this baby to be a Fred more than anything in the whole wide world. I already shared a special bond with Junior, I had from the day I learnt of his existence on 10 March 2012...parked on the side of the road in the Cotswolds with Matt. I nearly crashed the hire car in excitement! And I knew that he would be the apple of my eye. And to be able to call his name each day and think of my dad...well that was just an added cherry on the top of an already delicious cake.
My faith in Junior being a boy led to all sorts of purchases on my trip to America in 2012. Let me tell you, if Fred had been Frederica, things would be interesting right about now! He has a wardrobe fit for a king from me...he is getting more christmas presents than his mom, dad and granny put together!!!!
I bought him this when I was in New York City...kitsch I know...but I wanted him to know that his Aunty had such faith and love and trust in the universe that he was coming....
So tonight as I finish off this blog post and close my eyes on the BEST day of my life ever, I want Fred to know what he means to me. Bless - the poor kid will not be able to understand any of this for many years to come...but I want to tell him anyway...
Fred - my darling, sweet boy. My eyes fill with tears when I think of you lying with your little fleece hat on in the Sandton Medi-Clinic. You are 5 hours old right now. How I wish I was there to say hello to you in person. But I will be soon soon and I cannot wait! Freddles - you are named after someone very dear to us all. Each time we say your name, know that the love we feel for you is double what you can imagine. You are coming into a family of strong-willed women...oh, and your dad too! We are fierce with our love - we share it willingly and care deeply. So too will you learn how to be gentle and kind with your love. You are named after a legend Fredster - no doubt about that. A man who proposed to your Granny MD ( 'Mad-Dog/Mommy-Darling') when she was flat on her back in the hospital. A man who was the life and soul of the party. Who was generous with his friendship and welcoming of others. Who loved your Granny, your mom and I so unconditionally. What a great namesake! So my angel, Freddles, as you drift off into la-la land tonight I could not be happier you decided to join us today...27 October 2012..at 20h05...weighing 4.15kgs and measuring 53 cms. You share a birthday with family...especially your Uncle Paul in Australia...and boy oh boy, if you are anything like him you will be tearing around Granny MD's garden with no kit on...just like Uncle Paul used to do at your mom and my Gran and Gramps house...when you are big enough I will show you the photo and you will laugh! You are a blessing and I love you x
Thank you Carls and Tobes for this amazing gift of life - I am just blessed on so many levels right now. Enjoy him Granny MD...he will learn amazing things from you, lucky him x
Sweet dreams my much loved family from across the oceans and Fred, your Aunty is with you every step of the way kiddo xxxx
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